I think I have written something about wearing mask in one of my friend's blog... Give me a couple of minutes to search for...

I left two comments in my friend's two different blog entries:

This talks about weak vs strong:

I believe you need to so two things. First, do some self reflection to see if you are in the wrong. Second, you need to believe in yourself and keep cool.
The world had changed to a state that the stronger one survives.
Most of the people would put on a mask before they leave house for work. This is a kind of protective measure that these people make to protect themselves. This is especially true when these people view you as a potential competitor. Therefore, the word, friendship contradicted itself. Hence, you would hardly find a friend in the company.
The choice of "friend" is very crucial. You need to be caution if these "friends" are up to some motives before trust can be given to them.
Being gullible is neither good nor bad. It all depends on your judgment towards friends.
If you misjudge a friend, nothing to feel bad about, at least, you know him/her better.
Below are two scenarios that I think you have met.
a) Say you are entrusted to a job but you screwed it up because of some reasons. What you can to is to show better performance next time.
b) Say you are the victim. The failure of the task is not mainly because of you. You have, unfortunately become a scapegoat. Unless you can provide evidences, I don't think you can do much.
For both cases, you would be able to earn experience points. Nothing bad after all right!!

I hope my comments will help you feel better. Good luck my friend. –Teng Xiang


Posted by: RoBot | July 5, 2006 04:09 AM
===//===
I wrote these because she has some troubles with her colleagues.

Great that you have learnt something.
It is obvious you are taking about being considerate to people.
I agreed with him that being to caring to people around you will not do you good as no one can be content with what they have now.
I just want to add a bit to it and hopefully I can convince you that this is not the best solution (solution implied to being less considerate) for improvements. There are rooms for improvement.
Put it in a more direct way. Although, it is not an obligation to be considerate to people, it earns goodwill, goodwill between people.

Agreed with your friend:-
Being nice to people doesn’t mean over concern over people's feeling.
Being over concern might result:
a) you might over exhausted yourself.
b) people might take advantage of you.
c) people might think you are a weirdo for being over concern.

Points to add in:-
Goodwill can be earned through little intention. For instance,
a) smiling when you meet your colleague in the morning or
b) if you were to accidentally kick your colleague's chair, smile and apologize and react as appropriate or
c) being helpful (eg. help to look for documents) when you still have sometime to spare for them. (These are what I always do in office:-))

Although these intentions are insignificant, these actions sre effective in creating strong bonds between colleagues. Best of all, it keeps communication active. Good communication creates goodwill and hence preventing disputes from arising.
All these reactions come in naturally, it is in you - (i stress on it) and thus, no seriousness or over concern elements in it.

Remember in school when teacher teaches us a new word, considerate. Yes, considerate is a good, natural reaction which flows in after a faulty action with no ill-intention, being caused by you.
Thus, I urge you to be considerate in the way you feel most comfortable in and too making your "opponent" happy to be with you.
I hope this piece of analysis and advice is useful to you.

Cheers~~~
Teng Xiang


Posted by: Teng Xiang | March 27, 2007 11:13 AM

I wrote these two comments when she has just entered into a new company. I dont knoew how effective it is on her. I believe these can help you too.

cheerzz..
Teng Xiang top

Ting Siong, That is a LONG read. LONGEST ever in my blog. Whahaha Can I give you the longest-reply-award? Kekeke. No offence!

Quoting directly - "First, do some self reflection to see if you are in the wrong. Second, you need to believe in yourself and keep cool"

The first condition is NA. Means does not apply! You've met my manager before, you seen how he is like. He takes part of my commission for every case I close. How can I allow him to take my $ when I know I cannot respect him? Tsk Tsk..Against my own principles.

I truly think I must try to believe in myself and keep cool - which is what I am doing now.

Actually the good thing is, he allows me to go after much discussion - WOO HOO! top

hmm... hehe might not be related to your topic... Hehe these are what I believe in...
I wrote these few years ago for my friend lo.. hehe top